Disclaimer: What don't I own? SC! What DO I own...? Well, you should know by now...It isn't much, lemme tell ya. I'm just a poor college student. Worse yet, I'm just a poor ART student!

More AU warnings: I've changed Quinton's character entirely from what it was in the first movie. He seemed really nice, but for future plot reasons he's a bit of a jerk. I mean, he was kind of a flat chara in the first place, so I'm throwing a kink in his personality. And Bernard gets a bit ugly with April for a reason known only to him and me. Okay, that's a lie, I told y'all 'bout it in Chapter 1's intro. I know it's probably going to enrage all of you, but please just trust me. It will work out okay in the end! And so I've boosted the rating to PG-13 for the language and the violence.

Chapter 4: Charlie and the Love Boat Express

"April, come here." Bernard waved impatiently at the girl loafing at the kitchen table.

Reluctantly she obeyed, trotting over to him with fake enthusiasm. "Yes, Master?"

"Don't call me master," he chided. "It makes me feel bad."

"Oh, I'm sorry..." She smirked and added quietly enough so Sarah couldn't hear, "Honey."

He gave her a double-take, then backed her against the front door and scolded her with a hushed but harsh tone. "None of that. We decided to pretend that never happened, remember?"

"Oh, sure, I remember." She wiggled out from between him and the door, not wanting to repeat that incident all over again.

He let her get within a comfortable distance, then took a deep breath and tried to sound upbeat. "Today is an important day for you. You get to run your first errand for me."

Her eyes went wide and she jumped around in a little circle. "Oh, goodie! I get to leave this trap for a while and visit the land of the living!"

"I'll ignore that..." He pulled an envelope out of nowhere. "You need to take this to the Head of Research and Development, on five, okay? Can you remember that?"

"I haven't got a clue where that is, but sure..." She shrugged and took it from him anyway.

"You'll know. It's magically encoded on the paper." He reached for the door handle, then stopped and pointed at her. "Put up your hood first."

"Why?"

Bernard exhaled loudly, having forgotten how new she was to the whole slave thing. "Slaves must wear hoods over their faces when in public. So go on, put it up."

She mumbled, but pulled the hood of her green velvet dress over her head. "And I just thought it was there for decoration."

He flashed a half-smile and flung open the door. He commanded in a tone that made him sound like a worried parent, "Good, now go. And don't dawdle, okay? Come straight back!"

"Yes, Master! Right away..." She hiked up her skirt and leapt out in over-exaggerated gracefulness.

He made a "fine, then" face (for lack of better wording on the author's part) at her before shutting the door. He leaned warily against it and glanced in Sarah's direction. "Must she do that?"

She tried unsuccessfully to hide her grin. "You like it and you know it. Sir!"

He smacked his forehead. "Oh, no. Not you too, Sarah. Please!"

"Sorry, Bernard. Simply couldn't help myself." She curtsied in brisk apology, but obviously didn't mean it.

He rolled his eyes and grabbed his orange bag from the coat rack next to the door. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have important business to attend to. Charlie's moving in permanently, and I have the duty to help him settle in. So, I probably won't be back for a while."

She nodded, now completely serious. "I understand, sir. I'll have dinner ready, as usual."

April came to an intersection and squinted at the envelope. Directions appeared there, as if written by an invisible hand. "Okay, then. Almost there." She looked to the left at a bunch of elves pointing and whispering. Boy, she wished she could sock them all, teach them a good lesson about- Instead, she swallowed her anger and kept on going. Finally she reached a set of pearlescent doors with the words "Research and Development" over them. She let out a sigh of relief; it'd been quite a trip.

The second she opened the door, something inside blew up, sending sparks, debris and whatnot in her direction. She gasped and dodged out of the way as thick, black smoke poured out. A boy inside coughed and kicked something hollow and metallic, roaring, "Bloody 'oliday, I thought for sure it would work this time!"

As soon as she could kinda see, she wondered inside. "Excuse me?"

Quinton pulled off his goggles, leaving a huge patch of clean flesh on his otherwise filthy face. He frowned. "What now? This better be important."

She wanted oh so badly to make a random sarcastic remark, but held her tongue and handed him the envelope. Curious, she stuck around to see his reaction as he tore open the letter, read it impatiently and-

"I'VE BEEN WHAT?!?"

Bernard looked at his watch and bounced his knee impatiently. He hated being too early to anything, so decided to stand around and glare at some lazy elves for ten minutes. They finally got the hint and scurried back to work, just as Curtis approached him.

Bernard's eyes widened and his mouth dropped open. "Oh, my wrapping paper! Curtis, what happened?"

Curtis removed an ice pack from over his blackened eye and put his glasses on. He sounded remarkably calm as he explained, "Well, I was on my way to complain to Santa about Maigri when I ran into him."

Bernard jerked back, confused. "Sant-"

"Or should I say," Curtis barked over him, cutting him off. His anger became obvious as he shook the ice pack at Bernard in emphasis, "That I ran into Maigri's FIST!"

"Oh." Bernard's watch chirped and he started off in the direction of the reindeer stables. He turned and beckoned Curtis to come with him. Drained from the topic, he explained, "We simply don't tolerate violence in the workplace. You really need to talk to him now."

The younger elf made a rude noise and reapplied the ice. "I don't want Maigri's fist to meet my other eye!" He winced at the thought and asked weakly, "Could you do it for me?"

"I'll try, but I think you should do it yourself." He reached the doors and let Curtis through first. "Let Santa see your eye first hand. That alone should be enough to get Maigri canned."

Curtis laughed half-heartedly. "That would be nice, wouldn't it? Too bad IT'LL NEVER HAPPEN!"

"Here he comes, clam up." They took their positions by the double doors and tried to look pleasant. Bernard absent-mindedly wondered if he should send Curtis away. A black eye doesn't give a good impression, after all. But then again, this was Charlie we're talking about. He would be concerned, of course, but that wouldn't make him want to leave or anything.

It soon became obvious that Charlie was riding Chet, the clumsy reindeer. They wobbled dangerously in the sky before sliding in the room and screeching to a halt. The young man climbed off rather shakily and scratched Chet behind the ear. "Goood boy, Chet. You're doing much better now than you were a year ago. Keep working on it, and one day you might even lead the team!"

Chet giggled and scampered off to his stable for some lunch. It had been a long trip.

Charlie exhaled loudly and ran a hand through his wind-blown hair. He turned to Bernard and Curtis. "Hey, guys! How's it going?"

"Good." They piped, in that way that always lets one know that nothing's good.

"Whoa, Curtis, what happened to your eye? Are you okay?"

Curtis sighed. "Yeah, I'll tell you about it later."

"And how are you, Charlie?" Bernard quickly asked with a fake smile.

"Oh, great! I've graduated...I'm engaged..."

Curtis smiled genuinely for the first time all day. "Oh, congratulations. Who's the lucky girl?"

"Danielle. My first and only love." He stared into space with a love-sick expression on his face.

*GAG*. Bernard tried not to make a disgusted face. He tried really hard, really he did. "Ah, your...er...'Childhood Sweetheart'?"

"Yep." He bit his lip and snapped painfully back to reality. "But anyway...I guess the first thing I should do is check in with Dad and tell him I'm here."

"I'll do it!" Curtis took the excuse to find a fresh ice pack. He ran away quickly, leaving Charlie with a "but I wanted to talk to Dad!" expression on his face.

Bernard clasped his hands together. "Do you want me to take you to your room? Everything's laid out for you."

"Nah. I was wondering if you could help me find a job. I'm anxious to become a contributing member of this community."

Sometimes Charlie could be REALLY sappy.

"Funny you should say that. We just had an opening in the Research and Development department. You're an inventor, aren't you?"

"Well, I'd like to think so..." Charlie smiled modestly. "What position is it?"

"The Head-"

*Choke* "ARE YOU KIDDING?!?"

"No..."

The young man looked as though all his dreams were coming true at once. "Head? Head of Research and Development? You want ME to be the HEAD of Research and Development?"

Bernard rolled his eyes. "YES."

Then Charlie stopped in his tracks. "Wait, what happened to Quinton?"

"Well, it came into light that his morals were, shall we say, being compromised in his work. So, I demoted him."

*Flash*

Quinton is wearing an "elf costume" and ringing a bell outside of a Wal-Mart on a cold, snowy night. Someone throws some change in this collection can. He growls, "I'll get you for this, Bernard. Someday, I swear, I'll make you PAY!"

*End Flash*

Charlie frowned. "Oh my."

"Come on, I'll show you to your new office."

April walked in the door and removed her hood. She looked around and collapsed into a nearby overstuffed chair. "Boy, that was fun."

Sarah wasn't phased by April's obvious sarcasm. She sighed. "I wish I could still go out."

"Yeah, me too." She sat up. "Why can't you?"

"Um, well...I shouldn't say..."

"Oh, please tell me, so I can do it too."

Sarah blushed. A lot. "Well. There's. A. Boy..."

"Oh! I see..." April grinned. "And Bernard, being the controlling jerk that he is, won't let you go see him."

She pretended to be fascinated by the dust on a shelf. "It's because the guy I like is an elf, and Bernard doesn't believe in human/elf relationships."

April snorted, as if to say, 'Figures.' "What's his name?"

She smiled. "André. He's cute and sweet, is pro-human (obviously), works in the Packaging department, has a puppy named Cheer, and I really really really like him a lot!"

April almost said awww, out loud, but contained herself. "If you want, I can run him a note for you."

Sarah's eyes went wide. "Oh, would you?"

"Sure. Just tell me what he looks like and where to find him."

"I have a picture of him! Here..." She pulled out a heart-shaped locket with his picture inside. It was tiny and fuzzy, but April could make out his features well enough. He had dark, curly, mad-scientist hair, and a goofy grin on his youthful face. This should be simple enough.

Charlie sat at his new desk and inhaled with deep satisfaction. He loved the smell of chemistry in the afternoon. "Boy, if I'd known rising to the head of a department would be this easy, I would have tried to do it years ago." He smiled to himself and picked up a random prototype toy. He chuckled.

There was a knock on his door. "Come in?"

Maigri walked in and glanced around. He frowned. "Hey, slave, what are you doing just sitting there?"

"Huh?" A 'cat in the headlights' look fell across his face. Slave?

"I'm looking for an elf named Charlie. Where is he?"

Charlie raised an eyebrow. "I'm Charlie."

"Don't lie to me, slave. You can't be the Head of this department. You're human!"

"So?" Now he was really confused. Why was this crazy elf calling him a slave? "What does that have anything to do with me being in an important position?"

Maigri's face went red, and steam practically poured out of his pointed ears. He slammed his fists onto the desk and got in Charlie's face. "Don't give me that tone! Who's your master?"

"I don't have a master! I'm not a slave!"

"LIAR!"

Santa chose that moment to walk in the door. "Maigri, what the holly is going on here?"

"Dad! This crazy guy keeps accusing me of being a slave!" Charlie looked as though he would have a panic attack any moment.

Maigri looked back and forth between Charlie and Scott Calvin. He pointed to Charlie, "You mean, this is your SON?"

"Yes, Maigri, Charlie is my son. Now if you don't apologize and get out of here right now, I'll demote you!"

"Sorry!" He squeaked (without looking Charlie in the eye) and ran out of the room as quickly as possible.

Charlie tried unsuccessfully to shake the frightened, confused look from his face. "What the heck was that all about?"

Scott gave his son a crushing bear hug before answering, "The elves evidentially keep human non-believers as slaves."

"That's not right!"

Santa sighed heavily. "I know, Charlie. But what can you? Slavery is a tradition that's gone back generations."

Charlie rooted around for the right words. "Can't you abolish it or something?"

"I've been trying ever since I learned of it. Don't think I haven't. But the elves are divided on the subject. Too many are pro-slavery and not enough are pro-human. Even Bernard has two slaves!"

Charlie didn't like this piece of news. "Really?"

"Yeah. But let's not talk about it now. How are you? Sorry I missed graduation; I really wanted to see it."

Sarah was right, André really was sweet. He greeted April warmly and handed her a long love letter. He even thanked her. Now, the trick was getting home before Bernard.

She rounded a corner and bumped into someone, causing the hood to fall from around her head. Oh, crap, speak of the devil.

"April, what are you doing here? You should have been home hours ago."

"I, um, uh..." She tried to hide the letter, but not before he saw it.

"What's this?" He snatched it from her and read it. He crumpled it into a little ball and tossed it into a trash can before rounding on her. "You were going behind my back."

"Can you blame me?"

"I strictly forbade Sarah to communicate with that André guy. And you helped her."

"She loves him. Who are you to deny her seeing the guy she loves?"

"I am her master!" He shouted without any regard to where he was. He shook her violently. “Don’t you understand that? There isn't a moment she eats or sleeps when I don't will it. You should be as devoted!"

April couldn't take it any more. She'd put up with this attitude of his long enough, and now dared to stand up to it. "You're such a controlling bastard, Bernard!"

*SMACK* He slapped her so hard it knocked her to the ground. "Don't you EVER call me that AGAIN! EVER!"

Silence filled the workshop. Every eye fell on them, but neither of them noticed. A solid minute passed by with them frozen, April shaking on the floor and Bernard standing threateningly over her.

April turned to look up at him with fearful, tear-filled eyes and touched the place on her face that was already turning red. The light on her bracelet blinked more and more rapidly until it stayed on continuously.

Bernard stepped back, horrified at what he'd done. "April, I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"

Maigri's way-too-cheery voice called over the intercom system, "Bernard, please go straight to Santa's office. NOW. And bring the slave girl!"

Then the whispers started.

Chapter 5
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